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" Student, and lover of Art who have fallen deeply in love with classic fairy tales and Japan's beautiful aesthetic.! " in Penang, Malaysia. He earned an advance diploma in TAFE accounting at INTI College Penang and currently studying Graphic & Advertising at The One Academy Penang.

Thursday, September 15, 2011

无法同步的心情



样的感觉最容易在夜间袭击心房,那是左右为难,那是进退两难,给谁都会心烦意乱。可是,事情就是一旦发现了真相,就会害怕自己是否可以再次装作若无其事,并继续维持笑容?不可能,表面上或许不会在意,可是本身可能清楚心底深处就好像必须经过一条长满都是荆棘的通道一样,这是口是心非者必须承受的痛苦。仔细想想,隐藏的心意干脆就继续让它隐藏,那是把伤害减轻得多的唯一方法。人鱼公主渴望得到王子的爱,结果付出了代价,心意不也成了泡影。

有人可以拥抱爱情,有人被爱情玩弄,有人还未遇爱情,有人却渴望爱情。说起爱,有些人渴望得到爱情的感觉,就是被爱的感觉,却不懂得付出爱,结果伤了别人,自己也无奈。对爱情失去耐心的人总是希望自己尽快离开梦境,同时也希望爱自己的人也能醒来,不再受彼此之间的沉默不语而难过,结果梦外的世界,也只能以全新的面貌去面对新的一天。失去爱的一方,总是找人倾诉心情,因为害怕寂寞和无助吧。被人抛弃在空无一人的黑暗密室内,只要坚强,唯一可以给于自己能力和信心的人就只有自己。或许哭过了就没事,当然还会继续幻想某人可以指引自己进入另一个陌生的空间,只要还能感觉到某种向往的关怀气息,就会尝试接受,那会很可能全新爱情故事的第一章。新的一章会精彩吗?或则先来测试暧昧的滋味又如何?

接受的话,当然就会有所代价了。得失的不平衡,言语的不肯定,身份和性别上的差别,还有世人的眼光,都很可能让一个人失去比目前失去的更多。也许有人说,爱过了才会知道,爱过了才会了解,那是一种经验,那也很可能是一种承受,只有伤害他人和被人伤害的人才知道。轻易被伤害的人更很可能会在黑暗的密室内继续迷失方向而哭泣,容易难过的人更可能会在荆棘路上摔伤。果然如此,想象与实行是两回事,自己和他人都不同,因此,跟本就不可能因为谁而改变了原有的自己。要是真的改变了自己的话,可能是为爱自己的人改变呢?还是为爱别人才去改变自己?

只要自己始终还是自己的最爱,何必为了突然来袭又不太肯定的感觉而去即将要伤害自己。若要真正体会那种感觉,除非一天我不再真正去投入爱自己,而想把爱与人分享的话,我可能就会:拥抱爱情?被爱玩弄?去爱还是享受被爱的感觉?


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