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" Student, and lover of Art who have fallen deeply in love with classic fairy tales and Japan's beautiful aesthetic.! " in Penang, Malaysia. He earned an advance diploma in TAFE accounting at INTI College Penang and currently studying Graphic & Advertising at The One Academy Penang.

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

好久没有写生活的点滴了。




唉,什么无法容忍的态度
又或者自我颓废的念头,
什么不可丢弃的照片还是看不过去的回忆,
我都得告诉自己或许是时候了。


边周围发生了很多事情,虽然与自己扯不上极大的关系,选择以事不关己的角度去看这些事情的发生,偶然就会感受到现实的冷漠与残酷,还有对于不幸者的可笑和矛盾。虽然心里有很多说不出心声,可是却不可能开门见山以言语交待一切自己的不满与苦恼,最真实的言语可能会是抹杀自己身份和名誉的利刃。当知觉告诉自己当大部分人都认同的事见,即使自己有多独特的见解还是认为是无误的观点,多不愿意也都必须把自己伪装成一只哑巴的变色龙。

(依然还是名不正则言不顺,没有高人一等的身份,怎样的观点还是理论都没有说服力。没有权利就只能屈服于他人的操控。有时候,除了自己给与自己最大的支持外,其他什么都不可靠了。因为大部分人说的话才算数,那少部分人就得认命与接受,那是司空见惯的例子。)

说得清楚一些,从以前到现在,谎言与面具还是最理想不过的护身符。面对不愉快的事情,解决的方法往往都很可能是自欺欺人,改变心态去面对无法改变的结局。有时候,看人脸色是必然的,结果最真实的人格变质了,口是心非还是嘻皮笑脸的表情去让自己和他人都好过一些,渐渐连自己也觉得没有关系了,那又何必在意那么多呢。事不关己,己不关心就好。安于本分就好。

多米诺效应也发生在人与人的感情中,我的性格和态度随着面对不同的人改变着,也因为谁而让自己改变。昔日什么珍惜还是口头上的答应都只不过是当时在寻找话题中无中生有的联系而已,日子久了,价值也消失了。当日子走着,人在走着,渐渐的,自己也觉得最重要的还是自己需要保持清醒的状态去过自己的生活。看得清楚一些,自己也对某些事情可以掌握多一些。偶尔累了撑不住了,也会忍不住放肆一下。唉,什么无法容忍态度又或者自我颓废的念头,什么不可丢弃的照片还是看不过去的回忆,我都得告诉自己或许是时候了。无趣了,我就必须舍弃一些或许在某定义上已不再属于自己的,那会是物件或是承诺。与其不快乐还是跟耿耿于怀,倒不如说放就放,然后把自己看得重一些,那自己就会觉得有轻松些。


- 六月里的第一张章

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